NEW ORLEANS (WGNO) – The Facebook page “Can This Crawfish Get More Supporters Than Bobby Jindal?” is creating some buzz.
The page was created earlier this year when there was speculation that the Louisiana governor might run for president. But when Bobby Jindal made it official last week, so did Crawfish.
The Facebook page bills itself as the official campaign page for Crawfish (2016 Presidential Nominee). Its mission — to restore this country to greatness.
But Crawfish has a bit of a steep road to climb if he wants to achieve his goal. His Facebook page has 21,000 likes while Bobby Jindal’s professional page has 257,000.
Jindal, however, is polling toward the bottom of the Republican field for presidential hopefuls, registering at just 1% in the latest CNN/ORC poll. And in his own state his approval rating is at 32%, according to a recent poll.
The Crawfish also has a campaign page which explains his platform.
Crawfish is a red-shelled American, born and raised in the bayou of Louisiana. Crawfish was a shy little crustacean from a young age. He still hasn’t come of his shell – literally, because that would kill him, being a crawfish and all. However, Crawfish eventually found his passion for change and the American people/creaturedom. Crawfish realized this passion when he crawled into a gas station in Shreveport and asked where he could find a good plate of flapjacks in the city. He was met with blank stares. Crawfish then realized that the Every(wo)man is hesitant – nay, terrified – to speak their mind.
Race, gender, religious and political beliefs, biological genus – these things should not divide us. They should ENCOURAGE us. To speak, to join, to hold hands/claws as one and intelligently debate, but never brawl. Years and years of bureaucratic spats have categorically divided our citizens into separate schools of thought, incapable of unity, but #WeAreOne. #WeAreAllAmerica, and Crawfish believes that we can become one People again. #OneNationUnderClaws.
Crawfish doesn’t have a fancy education. He doesn’t have any Rhodes scholarships or years in a fancy columned office with official portraits lining his walls. Crawfish believes, however, that this allows him to relate strongly to the every(wo)man. Crawfish believes in being a strong voice of reason among all political parties, because Crawfish believes that identifying entirely with one party is just silly. We are one party – the Party of the American People.
In his spare time, Crawfish enjoys swimming, cooking (but not being cooked), going to the farmer’s market, a good match of water polo, morning yoga classes, and catching up on television. He thoroughly enjoys Game of Thrones, but that doesn’t mean that he’s not a strong advocate for women’s rights!
Crawfish is a brilliant mind with a consistent record of being a crawfish.
#Crawfish2016
